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Long-Awaited Child - The Book Introduction

From first trying for a baby at 31 years old to finally holding my babies in my arms at age 39, I, along with my partner, Ian, went from many, many rock-bottom lows to some heart-bursting highs. Eight long and, at times, excruciating years might make some people throw in the towel, but we were determined to have a family - no matter how long we waited.

To this day we still do not know why I was not able to fall pregnant naturally; however, during the time for our dream of having a child come true, we knew we had to explore all possibilities. Nothing was a guarantee in the process, not until finally holding our baby- well, babies (but we’ll get to that later) - in our arms did we know for sure we would be a complete family.

All options outside of a natural pregnancy are expensive and emotional, and still provide no certainty for having a child. Over time, we explored all options after conceiving naturally was unsuccessful - in-vitro fertilisation, foster care, adoption and surrogacy. It is said hindsight is a wonderful aspect, though it takes a situation to occur before that saying reaches fruition. Well, this book is my hindsight on our fertility struggles from first trying to have a baby to our baby joy eight years later.

I always thought meeting the right partner and then having a family together was how my life would naturally play out. I figured that motherhood was something I’d come to easily when I was a bit older and the time was right for me. It was not until I was in my early 30s and really ready to be a mum that I realised how much I truly wanted a family.

As our struggle became evident, I would witness family, friends or even strangers having a beautiful moment with their baby or child and it would break my heart. I longed to have that same bond and unconditional love with my own baby. 

I was never really concerned with how I was going to have my baby; I did not necessarily need to be pregnant myself, just as long as I had a baby of my own to love. I remember back in my early 20s when a friend was pregnant with her first baby. One day we were catching up and she was devastated as her doctor had told her she would have to have a Caesarean section instead of the natural birth she had planned. I kept my opinions to myself and consoled her, but to be honest I did not understand why she was so upset as to me it was the same end result - a baby of her own to love. I guess we all have our own ideas and dreams of when and how we want to have our family and at times we all have to go down different paths to get to the same place at the end.